Episode 18 Survival Guide

Hello you

Well we've only just got to sleep after our self experimenting shenanigans. We didn't quite drink 100 cups of coffee, but it felt like it.

Advertisers have been trying to use science to get us to buy stuff ever since the first ad on UK TV. So we thought we'd have a look at this sort of thing and try some stuff out for ourselves.

So we trialed a number of energy drinks including Red bull, which doesn't give you actual wings, so no flying south for us this winter. But you may notice us becoming more and more hyper as the show progresses. We also had our first interviewee, Laura an Osteopath and friend of the show, illuminate us about deep heat and that stuff they spray on hurt footballers. She also told us what the clicks are when you crack your joints. Turns out it isn't inter bonal castanets as I thought.

There was the usual blather too, including a James Bond scene reenactment by Pete & Jonty, some beard care tips from Pete and a Tron reference. A mention on our next show to whomever spots that one. There's also a mini nervous breakdown from the Tearoom's legal department right at the end. It's not quite as convincing as this next guy, but it's not far off. Skip it 1.30 for the best bit.

Bye

Marky (the T-Shock)

4

Episode Thirteen Survival Guide

We know what you're thinking.

"Surely you've covered everything worth knowing about crime!" we know you'll say, and we acknowledge your surprise at receiving this timely second episode on crime.

"I thought I had been well equipped to deal with a dishonest world but then you tell me Part Two is on its way," we contemplate you squealing, noticeably betrayed and elated at the same time. You're welcome.

"Another thirty minutes about baddies? Things are worse than I thought on this planet we call Earth," we anticipate you stating.

Well, here it is. Episode Thirteen, Part Two. Crime. Part Two of Episode Thirteen, about crime. Episode Crime, thirteen part. Two.

There are some bad people out there. People who steal chips, dig up bones and poo on your freshly washed car. But there are also some animals who do the same and it is these guys that Part Two focuses on.

Listen with awe as the boys in Abigail's Tearoom inform you of the terrors of shoplifting seagulls, gangland keas and CIA-trained cats.

Gasp in amazement when you learn of badgers' reign of terror over this land in which we live (Britain).

And weep with weeping as Jonty relives his bad ape experience.

That's not all. The boys then attempt to assemble their most awesome animal crime teams: three animals for the perfect heist. Which would you choose?

Spoiler alert! Pete goes down the Hollywood route for his team. Remember these?

Skippy

Flipper

Gentle Ben

Lassie

Mr. Ed

We'll be back in a couple of weeks when Pete gets us to dish out love advice. Thanks for your continued downloads and attention and that. Much love!

Hello all!!!

Welcome hello ya'all!

Thanks for reading our little blog - and this entry is... "dum dum dum" an apology!

We (I) have been a little tardy in getting Episode 9 out to you all, and we (I) should take responsibility for our (my) failings in publishing it so late...

Stay with us, we're amateurs, who are amateurish, we dreams of being less so.... nag us, we need it!

EarlJonty

Episode 6 Survival Guide

So, episode 6 eh?

This episode is a celebration of the world record being set for the most people applying sunscreen simultaneously (pretty exciting i'm sure you'll agree) check out the link.

This got us onto the subject of world records, ones we'd want (fastest person dragged behind a motorbike) ones we wouldn't want (most cockroaches in mouth) and ones we already have (amazingly no video is available for Jonty's 3 day Kim Jong Ill impression) and all this via the difference between midget and dwarf tossing, dogs opening car windows, worlds largest steak and a number of mentions of sickness.

Are aliens tempted to attack earth just for our large food?
Does Marky have a real record?
How do you ensure that your friends never want to play 'sardines' with you again?
How long is too long when it comes to keeping 1 inch metal nails in your skull?
How do cobras feel about being kissed and, worse, how do they feel about you kissing their friend?

All this important information, and much more, is covered in episode 6 - 'Sniffing Feet and Kissing Cobras'.

Please enjoy responsibly.

A non-survival guide blog

Hi everyone, hope you sipping a nice cuppa (trans: Cup of tea)!

Well yesterday was a mammoth day! Due to one of us being away for 2 weeks, we were determined to get 2 podcasts recorded in one day, a feat that last time we tried ended in the second cast being binned :(

It was also a exciting day because we'd taken the plunge and bought a new microphone, so instead of each of us on headphone mics, we know have one to share between us all. And it is from a great mic manufacturer, so we had/have high hopes for it, turned out they were proved right, such a rich full sound.

Why have we splashed on this new mic? Well I think we've all been startled by how many of you are downloading the podcast, and, this is the big one, sticking with us!!! And we think and hope we're getting better, we're new to this and learning as we go - and that's why we always bleat on about feedback. If you guys were a live audience we'd know what works and what doesn't, but as this medium can be so 'remote' we rely on email (studio@abigailstearoom.co.uk) twitter (@abigailstearoom) and facebook to keep us in touch with you, and to know what we're doing badly and what we're doing well.

Keep with us, we're all slightly driven to keep getting better... help us?

Anyway, I digress (a shock listeners, I know! 'winky smiley')..... As two of us had an hour before the others joined us, we decided to try and record a little into/jingle/song for a quiz (that hopefully will feature in Episode 7) using the new mic. So it ended up having a guitar track, a banjo track and a double bass track!!! Plus 2 vocals tracks! It's the first time one of us had written and sung on a song, so that was doubly exciting!!! Maybe we'll put it up as a separate download??? Not sure what you guys want (if anything) in terms of additional content, so let us know.

Bear with us as we get used to this new tech, like any new tool it can take a while to get the best from it.

I've also just taken some of the pre-show recording clips and thrown through Garageband to make a little 'cheesy-DJ' demo for Chris, hope you like it mate!

Anyway, must dash, email's are piling up....

And remember "If you're problem doesn't seem better after a 'cuppa', you've got the wrong problem"

EarlJonty

Episode Five Survival Guide

Good day to you, dedicated follower of pods!

Man, it feels good to be out of that cellar. Don't get me wrong, Markeejay was good company and all but it was the smell down there that really got to me. That musty, unloved smell of yesteryear that things once useful possess. Still, he's had a shower now and everything's OK again. Zing!

So Episode Five is released and it's me, Chris, hosting again. Hosting a podcast is not easy. There seems to be so much to remember and so much going on that I find my brain overheating regularly, which is why I would like to apologise for the baggy, rambling episode you may or may not have heard yet. My respect for radio DJs has increased dramatically since we've been doing this podcast.

This week we're discussing British phrases and sayings. Why? The beauty of podcasting is that it is a truly international medium and according to the stats from our hosts at Halcyon, Abigail's Tearoom has listeners from all over the world. It seemed only fair that we help the world understand English, starting with some of the bizarre sayings we use every day.

On a separate matter, there's talk that Abigail's Tearoom might release a mini episode between full episodes - watch this space. Also, new tech may be on the way too so the poor sound quality should be a thing of the past!

So enjoy the episode, sorry for the poor sound quality and may you achieve many wonderful things this week.

Much love! Chris.

Now some links that may or may not tie in with the episode...

Cockney Rhyming Slang

Expressions and Sayings